Way back at CES 2006, Bill Gates first coined the term “LIVE Anywhere.”  This was his overarching initiative within Microsoft to encourage convergence across numerous different disciplines and products.  Among the big announcements at the time were the moving of Windows Media Center functionality to the Xbox 360, Windows LIVE search (later renamed BING.com), and increased Xbox LIVE functionality that would even include cell phone support.

Until a few weeks ago, all of these well laid plans had come to fruition, with the notable exception of the elephant in the room: Xbox LIVE for Windows Mobile.  Over the past four years, representatives of Microsoft have skirted around the topic, taking every opportunity to dodge questions about the long promised, but never delivered product.  Just for a trip down memory lane, here is a look at the version of the product that was demoed at E3 2006, several months after Gate’s initial CES keynote. (Photos courtesy of Engadget.com)

Fortunately for those that had given up hope of ever seeing the “Achievement Unlocked” message popping up on their cell phone of choice, the introduction of Windows Phone 7 at today’s Mobile World Congress 2010 ushers in a new age of promises for Xbox LIVE on the go.  Gamers will now be able to add to their gamerscore, access their friends list, play turn based multiplayer games, and even view their avatar, without any need to turn on their console.

“Windows Phone 7 Series was built from the ground up with entertainment in mind, and its unique design allowed us to bring some of the best gaming and community features of Xbox LIVE to the Windows mobile platform. It has always been our vision to expand the Xbox LIVE service to connect people to their games, entertainment and friends wherever they go, and the launch of Windows Phone 7 Series is an important step toward that goal.” — Ron Pessner, general manager of Xbox LIVE Mobile

The image above reflects what you can expect to see once the product launches later this year.  Whether this will live up to the broad promises made by Gates four years ago has yet to be seen, but it looks like there is plenty to be excited about.  Who knows? Maybe I will finally have an excuse to retire my iPhone.  Now to just get Sony to finally release that PSP phone that we have all been dreaming about…

Game: Matt Hazard: Blood Bath and Beyond
Developer: Vicious Cycle Software
Genre: Side-scrolling Shooter
Verdict: A hilarious arcade shooter that satisfies the nostalgia for a great old-school side scroller.
Pros: Hilarious dialogue and one liners, awesome parodies of other video games, good game mechanics.
Cons: Hard, hard as hell,and hell gave up playing on the highest difficulty, no online co-op.
Acquired: Developer Provided
Price: 1200 Microsoft Points ($14.99)/$14.99 on Playstation Network

Matt Hazard is back, and he’s better than ever – if you call being reverted to 2D better. Thanks to the folks at Vicious Cycle Software, the world is once again graced with a tale of everyone’s favorite self-aware video game character, Matt Hazard, and once again, his very existence is in danger.

Bu-du-bu-bu-du-bu...bu

In Matt Hazard: Blood Bath and Beyond, Matt’s old nemesis, General Neutronov, has hatched a new scheme to rid himself of Matt. Rather than face Matt head on, Neutronov has gone back in time and kidnapped the old…errrr…younger 8-bit version of Matt.  As Matt chases Neutronov through the server in order to rescue himself…his self…hisself…feh, nevermind, he must traverse the worlds of his fellow heros. These parodied worlds include those of Super Mario Bros., Mirror’s Edge, Team Fortress, Portal, Bioshock, and many more.

Matt, being the self-aware character that he is, is quick to throw out a witty comment on almost everything he encounters. In one boss encounter, Matt faces a Johnny-5 style robot (Short Circuit, circa 1986. If you’ve never seen this film, walk away from this review and go watch it. I’ll be here when you get back) aptly named Juliette-5. During the battle, Matt quips aloud, wondering if Juliette-5 is still alive (again, a reference to the movie that you should have now watched). Matt’s good buddy and all around voice-in-his-head, Quentin, has his share of funny moments too. When Matt heroically faces off with a gargantuan boss that is a mix between an elephant, a hippopotamus, and a rhino, Quentin asks what one calls such a mix – brace yourselves…get ready for it…a h-eleph-ino. Ha, get it. A hell if I know. That’s funny…right? Fine. Don’t laugh. I thought it was hilarious.

H-elep-ino!

All joking aside (ok, most joking aside), Blood Bath and Beyond is a very well done game. The shooting mechanics are very much like Shadow Complex, while the level design and power ups are reminiscent of Contra. Enemies are appropriate to the level in which they reside, and they are plentiful. By far, in this writer’s opinion at least, the best enemy type in the game is the Mountie-driven moose-head tank in the Canadian level. That’s aboot…about as funny as it gets. The bosses are also fun, becoming more outlandishly awesome as the game progresses.

One cannot talk about this game without mentioning the difficultly level. I started the game on “Damn, this is hard”, which would normally be considered the “normal” difficulty. This difficultly level gives you five continues to use throughout the game. I would never claim that I am the best gamer around, but I’m not a neophyte either. On this setting, I was dead and out of continues by the fourth world. It is not often that I have to drop down to casual, “Wussy” in this game, to give myself infinite continues. To be honest, “Wussy” was challenging, but doable. I’m sure that “Damn, this is hard” is doable as well, but I did not have the time to continue to mess with it. The hardest difficulty level is called “Fuck this shit,” and I surmise that it was implemented just so the developer’s can laugh their asses off each time they hear a story of someone attempting it. If anyone has beat an substantial part of this game on this difficulty, get it one video and post it on YouTube. You will be considered a video-game god.

It's Doc. He's alive.

Graphically, this game is beautiful. It has the expected high-definition sheen, though it only runs as high as 720p. The character’s are well done, and the environments are gorgeous at times. It also has a pseudo-3D element, which allows some enemies to be in the background and allows Matt Hazard to shoot into the background. Though the game is pretty to look at, the developers poke fun of themselves by describing certain events between scenes with text similar to, “and the lab exploded in a monstrous explosion that would have been way out of budget for us to put into a cut scene.”

Sound is also well done in Blood Bath and Beyond. It is not stellar, but it is good. The sound effects are what you would generally expect from a shooters (explosions, guys groaning in death, etc.). The level music is very reminiscent of a good ’80s side-scroller, complete with an intensity change in the songs during the boss fights. There is nothing bad to say about the sound in this game, but there’s nothing great to say either. It was well done, but that is all.

Honestly, Blood Bath and Beyond is one of the better Arcade games that I have played. It clocks in at about four hours of gameplay, and for $14.99, that is definitely worth it. It does incorporate a co-op element that I did not have a chance to try during my review period, but that just gives me an excuse to replay the game on a harder difficulty level. Unfortunately, the co-op gameplay is onscreen only; no online guys. Sorry. If you like parody games and like the feel of Contra and Shadow Complex, go grab Blood Bath and Beyond. If you’re not sure that you want to drop $15 on chance, then go grab the demo, which is available on both Xbox Live and the Playstation Store. Whatever you do, don’t think that you’ll be able repeat one of the one-liners from the game to your wife and she’ll laugh as hard as you did. I tried; it didn’t work.

Well, after the first month of play, Timegate and Southpeak have taken all the feedback on board and produced the first patch for Section 8. They have tweaked their asses off to try and re-balance the massive multiplayer battles.

The new update includes:

• Tank controls have been tuned, making them more intuitive and responsive.
• The improved automatch system offers enhanced responsiveness when searching for a server
• Bot AI has been improved. Bots will now follow and defend allies and will pursue retreating targets more aggressively
• An improved stat tracking framework

The update is available on Xbox Live and Games for Windows Live now. For more details check out the Section 8 website.

Major Nelson announced today on his blog that Microsoft will once again be opening it’s Xbox Live preview doors for anyone anxious to take an early peek at what’s next in store for the online service.

Microsoft has a few new integrations that accepted users can try out like Twitter, Facebook and Zune, and signing up for the chance to be chosen to test out the beta could not be simpler!  Here’s what you’ll need:

• Head on over to http://connect.microsoft.com/XboxLIVEUpdate , and sign in with the user name that is associated with your gamertag

• After you are singed in, you have to fill out the sign up survery.  This will have some basic questions like where you live, your internet connection, your ISP, and so on.  This is so Xbox Live can choose the right combination of people to test out the new features.

• You’ll also need your console’s 12 digit ID, which can be found in the system info tab of the dashboard.  An incorrect ID could result in you not being chosen.

The really good news is that Xbox is looking for thousands of people to test this out, so the chances of you getting picked to try it all out are pretty good, and it’s open to anyone who uses the service.  Both Gold and Silver memberships will be considered, but Gold accounts will be looked at first.  Once you have signed up for the service, Xbox will notify you if you are accepted.  If you have any more questions, visit www.xbox.com for more information.

Good Luck, and happy Xbox Tweeting!