There is a person on Twitter that I followed because I enjoyed their gaming tweets. Then about twice a week this person would make a remark like, “Hey guys, don’t you hate it when you can’t play Xbox because of your girl?”
At first I sent a reply saying, “Why don’t you try to get her involved and find out what games she might like.” No response from this person.
And the tweets just kept coming. Two to three times a week this person would make statements like that and it started to make me angry. Believe me when I say that I understand where he’s coming from but even sharing my personal experiences with him via private message didn’t start the conversation so I get the feeling he’s bitching to be bitching and not looking for a solution.
I know there are people (both male and female) out there that ARE looking for a solution and it’s a really sore subject for me so I will give you a little background into my past and present situations.
My ex-husband was a gamer when I met him. I gamed as well and we were a really good fit together at least in our shared interest there. He would spend hours locked up in our bedroom with his various gameboy’s (old, pocket, color, advance, sp and micro) and that is how he would spend his evenings. I would do the same until the fateful day my PS2 came home and my brother informed me that Metal Gear was going online.
I played that game like no one should ever play a game. I didn’t shower for days, I stayed up for almost a week continuously playing and not eating: I was addicted.
I had my points of normal activity mind you, but he couldn’t take it.
What was the problem? I was online. There were men online. I was a huge minority on that game and in his mind, I was having cyber sex with all of them. He became super suspicious and would leave the house only to sneak back in the house and watch me from the kitchen. Even then, after hearing me yell out things like, “Pillbox Purgatory is the best map on MGO, yes it is, yes it is, nuh uh” he still thought I was having relationships with every person in the game. He became so angry at me that he actually urinated on the floor, in front of the television while I was in a match. It didn’t matter that I tried to show him how much I loved the series and the game or how much it meant to me. No amount of talking or counseling helped. That was the end and we divorced a month later.
Fast forward to present day and guess what? I actually met someone who I talked into getting a 360. When he told one of his friends right before we had our first date that I played Gears of War, the guy told him to marry me. We like different things, especially in the gaming department; I’m a shooter fanatic and dungeon crawler while he likes point and click adventures and fighters. The main thing is: He loves me for who I am, and I am a hard-core gaming freak. When I’m spending hundreds of dollars a month on games I don’t hear one word of disapproval. When I am online he can get a little jealous but it’s rare and understandable – the men outnumber the women (for now). Luckily it’s not the kind of jealous that would send me packing.
After all that being said it is possible to introduce your partner into games if they haven’t previously and if they are totally not interested, at least let them see how much it means to you. I never in a million years would have thought my best friend would own a PS3 but she does. She bought it for her fiance and she actually sat through many hours of Need for Speed the other night… something I would have bet a million dollars against. People change and they come around. She knows that when she is spending hundreds of dollars on MAC makeup, he’s not going to complain at all.
And with the Wii hanging around most households, there really is something for everyone. From fitness games to learning games and even community games on the 360, we really have so much to choose from. There should be something for you two to enjoy together.
I think the main focus should be communication. Let your partner know how much it means to you. Let your partner also know how much THEY mean to you. Try out some games together.
Last but not least, hug a lot. It can work wonders.
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