Title: Fairytale Fights
Platform: XBox 360, PS3, PC
Publisher: Playlogic
Price: $59.99
Verdict: Fun with friends if you can get over the game play flaws.
Pros: Sliding around in blood is fun!
Cons: Nothing about the actual game play is satisfying.
Have you ever wondered what happened to those childhood heros we used to have growing up? You know, the ones who had wolves hunting them, step-mothers plotting to remove their hearts, people lying to them about their threads, or creepy guys selling them veggies that are WAY too expensive. Well, wonder no longer. Our worst fears (or most amusing imaginings) have come true! Fairytale Fights gives us the answer. They’ve fallen from the grace of fame, and it’s our job to get them back. Unfortunately, Playlogic’s delivery is left wanting. There are, however, some amusing inclusions into the mix. Let’s explore, shall we?
Fairytale Fights is rated M. It is definitely NOT something for children. Period. Not only would they, and most adults for that matter, have a very hard time controlling the characters, but were they able to do so, they may have nightmares about all the carnage they would witness. With that, let me introduce you to the main players. As you may have guessed, Little Red Riding Hood has become quite depressed. Granny has apparently found someone else to spend her time with, and poor Red has been discarded like last week’s newspaper. I haven’t decided whether we’re talking clinical depression, or bipolar disorder, but either way, Red isn’t in a good way and is looking to take it out on some poor unsuspecting sap. Snow White has lost her ever-loving mind. The comorbidity in this wayward princess is unreal; a psych student’s dream come true. Needless to say, she was my favorite character to play. Beanstalk Jack is a moron. Let’s face it, he got suckered into trading for “magic beans”. I mean, really? He hasn’t gotten any smarter here, but he apparently still gets lucky. All the more reason for him to be reckless? Perhaps. But even so, he’ll never compete with the Naked Emperor in that department. Talk about a sucker. He’s still trying to pretend that he sees those clothes he isn’t wearing. Chalk one up to narcissism for this bearded baron’s denial. So now you know who you’re dealing with. Throughout the game, you’ll run into various other childhood favorites, most of which you’ll be beating to a bloody pulp in a frenzy of insanity. You’ve always wanted to hack Pinocchio into fire wood though, right?
On to game play, where all of my qualms about this game are. First, the controls. I played the 360 version of the game, but I’m assuming the control configuration for the game are similar on, at least, the PS3. This is one of the games that seems that no matter how long you play, the controls never come naturally. I had to think about it every time I tried to drink a potion. Where most games will have buttons controlling fight related elements, this one has them spread from the right joystick to the left and right triggers, and back. There is no rhyme or reason to the layout. The only thing I liked about the controls, in fact, is something that would most likely irritate the hell out of any one of my other gaming friends. The only attack button is the right joystick. Moving it around in random ways will lead to different attacks, but there is no specific pattern that works better than any other. The only way to get more powerful attacks is to use your glory attack (when your attack meter is full), which is the right trigger. Being someone who has a hard time pulling off complicated attack sequences, I liked this.
While we’re talking about weapons, I’ll mention that there are something like 140 different weapons divided into 4 different categories. They’ve included everything, and I wouldn’t be surprised if the kitchen sink was one of them! Each weapon is rated in flowers (light), stars (light to medium) or skulls (heavy). When you pick up a weapon, it tells you the name of the weapon and it’s rating. Which is good, because it is VERY difficult to see what you’re picking up during game play. This becomes a problem when trying to decide whether to throw your current weapon to the wayside in exchange for this new mystery weapon. Notice that I said throw. Because you do throw the weapon, and unless you pay attention to where it went, you’re stuck with your new weapon regardless of whether its better or significantly worse. Another disheartening game play issue that drives me nearly as crazy as one of our heroines.
Continuing on with our game play discussion, we move to Taleville. Actually, this is where the game starts and where all of your in-game options reside. You can switch between characters here, controlling whoever you please at the end of each chapter, if you so desire. This is also where you can visit places like The Inn, The Taxidermist, The Sculptor, The Options Square, Weapon Smith, or The Bank; each controls either information about your stats, or the ability to change an option or two. Good luck finding what you’re looking for though. Taleville is a very busy place. While there are books placed outside each pit stop that give you information or control, determining which is which takes a bit of patience. No wonder there is an achievement for staying in Taleville for 15 minutes.
From The Inn, you can choose to play in arena or quest mode. Arena mode takes you to a menu that allows you to choose a background, and rules for your player-on-player mayhem. Quest mode takes you on the long and arduous journey back to fame. You can play either mode with your friends either locally, or online. This is perhaps the best part of the game. It doesn’t take much thought to play the game, so you can chat away with your buddies, or use the taunts provided to entertain yourselves. Watch out when you trash a bad guy in quest mode, though. The opposite side of the screen takes on a pop-up that shows the gruesome demise of your foe, much to the frustration of anyone else who’s view of their action was just covered. As entertaining as that is (when it isn’t me losing visibility), my favorite thing to do when playing with friends is to slide around in the blood that’s been shed. Slide around for 330 ft continuously, and you get an achievement; yeah, I got it. There are also achievements based on the amount of blood you cause to be spilled. This, to me, is highly amusing. It doesn’t, however, make up for the fact that it’s incredibly difficult to tell what part of the screen you can and cannot go to. Not everything that you see is explorable, and there is no way to know which is and which is not. It’s almost as if you are constantly walking on a ledge, unable to get any further back, but at risk of falling to your doom more often than not. Good thing we’re given limitless lives, I guess.
The audio only gets irritating when someone uses the same taunt entirely too often, and as there are only 4 emotes that can be performed, it’s going to happen. Otherwise, there is a decent mix of sounds and songs. Not that they’re any kind of robust, rich sound, but for the game concept, they work well. No complaints here.
The graphics seem to be a bit ironic in my opinion. They’re very colorful, and very cutesy, which I think is the point. Bubbly characters who are annihilating everything that does or doesn’t breathe, just works for me. I think the game would lose some of it’s satirical nature if it were drawn to match the darkness of the concept. However, I do have a friend who played the game with me had serious issues with the graphics. The opinion there was that if they were going for cutesy, they should have gone more anime style. This is a somewhat deranged cutesy, if you can imagine it. As someone who loves anime, though, I never suspect that the story will match the animation. SO I think it would be less ironic if it were drawn as such. At any rate, it’s very colorful and well done, all except for the depth issue, but I really think it’s only frustrating because of the limitations on gameplay. So, no complaints with the graphics for me either.
All in all, the game is funny: in theory. The artwork is amusing, as is the bloodshed. The controls and actual game play are not well executed, and make this a game one that I would suggest you don’t spend nearly $60 on. However, if you’re just looking for something to play with your buddies while having that weekly Saturday night kegger, this is your game. Just don’t say I didn’t warn you. Oh, and think of me when you’re sliding around in that crimson pool of gooey craziness.
Popularity: unranked [?]
